Sunday, January 13, 2008

Mortality

My friend Pete’s father died in his sleep yesterday morning. This was not unexpected. But it is still painful for him and his family.

I don’t have a proper tribute to Ogden, as I barely knew him. What I did know of him was through his son who is one of the most exceptional, uncompromising and fascinating people I’ve ever known. If a son is a reflection of his father then I can say I did know him. I admired him. I respected him. I loved him.

So, as I’ve gone about my business the last two days it’s been with a sense of loss. Concern for my friend and his family. Helplessness knowing that there’s little I can do and selfishness for thinking about my own helplessness amidst their pain and loss.

So I offer this to you.

Sons and fathers. These are probably the more uncomfortable of family relationships. Male roles often dictate that we not speak of our love for one another. Stupid. I hate that convention, yet I adhere to it far too much. So, please, if you’ve still got a father around, or a father figure, value that relationship. Validate it. Often.

Death. It’s natural. It’s painful. It makes little sense at the same time as it makes perfect sense. But death can also equal peace. It should equal peace. The conclusion of a life well lived.

Life. It is a gift. Live it as such. Make more of today than you expected. Surprise yourself. Surprise those around you.

Love. Let go of hate. It is a burden that you need not bear. Surround yourself with people that you do love. Nurture the best of those relationships.

So. Those are the deep thoughts for the weekend. Thanks for reading and sharing your own thoughts from time to time.

B!

1 comment:

GK said...

My thoughts are with your friend, I can relate a lot as you know. Very touching piece, indeed.

GK